Baseball Fans Are Used to Getting Rooked

Deep Blue, the computer that defeated world chess champion Garry Kasparov, can sort through 200 million decisions in one second.

Frank Deford of ESPN SportsZone thinks a computer should be named baseball commissioner, one who could make 200 million decisions a second.

Deford said that here are the responses we can expect from such a computer:

“It’s a league matter. . . . Let’s talk about it in the 21st century. . . . I feel very strongly about the designated hitter. It’s good in the American League. It’s bad in the National League. . . . Gee, that’s a tough one. Let me ask Jerry Reinsdorf. . . . The National Pastime . . . the National Pastime . . . The National Past . . .”

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Trivia time: What Angel hit the first home run in the franchise’s first season in 1961?

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The high road: Atlanta Hawk center Dikembe Mutombo has no use for the Chicago Bulls’ Dennis Rodman after the “Worm” slapped him in the face during their NBA playoff series and was ejected.

“He isn’t crazy, he’s sick,” Mutombo said. “I would not lower myself. I am an educated man. I would not do that. My father would not respect me if I spoke to Dennis Rodman.”

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Loose change: While cleaning out his locker recently, Cleveland Indian pitcher Albie Lopez found his $7,800 paycheck from last September. He had forgotten all about it.

Since he obviously doesn’t need the money, Lopez should send the check to his favorite charity.

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Right on: Boston Red Sox Manager Jimy Williams after using a different lineup in eight consecutive games:

“Eight days a week. That’s a song isn’t it? The Beatles, right?”

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Bashing Brown: Dan Le Batard of the Miami Herald on Larry Brown’s five-year, $25-million coaching contract with the Philadelphia 76ers:

“Did I miss something or did Brown win something in the NBA when I wasn’t looking?”

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Looking back: On this day in 1979, Dave Kingman of the Cubs hit three home runs and Mike Schmidt of the Phillies hit two as Philadelphia defeated Chicago, 23-22, in 10 innings at Wrigley Field. The slugfest included 11 home runs and 50 hits.

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Trivia answer: Ted Kluszewski in the first inning of the Angels’ first game, April 11, 1961 in Baltimore.

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And finally: Dan Shaughnessy of the Boston Globe lamenting Larry Bird’s decision to coach the Indiana Pacers:

“How could Larry Bird leave the most fabled franchise in pro basketball and join a ragtag team that goes back no further than George McGinnis?

“If the Celtics are the New York Yankees of basketball, then the Pacers are the San Diego Padres. And now Larry Bird is going to coach in a building in which the sound of race cars is played over the PA.”